


Who Needs a Sexbot?

by alcumia



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anal Sex, Bulges and Nooks, F/M, Oral Sex, Reverse Het, Sex Talk, Spitroasting, Threesome - F/F/M, Trans Female Character, Xeno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-21
Updated: 2016-05-21
Packaged: 2018-06-09 19:12:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6919624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alcumia/pseuds/alcumia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jade, Roxy, and Equius are building a robot together when their conversation turns to... lewd topics. Equius sweats. Jade and Roxy deal with his lascivious thoughts the best way they know how: by indulging them completely, and then some.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who Needs a Sexbot?

Roxy cracked her knuckles and began typing away at her laptop. “So, what kinda sexbot are we building today?”

“We are not making a…” Equius began with a grimace. “Excuse me… a _sexbot_.”

“Well, any robot can be a sexbot if you try hard enough,” Jade spoke up, testing the joints on the generic humanoid robot she and Equius were constructing. “And use enough lube.”

“Yeah! That’s the spirit!” Roxy cheered, raising her bottle of Perrier in approval before taking a sip.

Equius felt sweat dripping down his forehead, an indigo blush forming on his face. “It’s… a training robot. Its only intended use is for sparring and nothing more.”

Roxy nodded. “Right, sparring. What kind of sparring?”

“Wrestling!” Jade answered for him, grabbing a can of grease and spraying a bit into an elbow joint.

“Oh, okay, wrestling,” the blonde replied, dragging a thumb over her mousepad. “So it just grab you in its strong, mechanical arms and pin you to the ground.” She bit her lip, humming quietly. “And once it’s got you in place, it pulls down your pants, whips out its thick metal rod, and…” She closed her eyes, grunting as she thrusted her pelvis in her chair, and Equius made a choking noise in response.”

Jade scoffed, throwing her hair back as she looked at Roxy disapprovingly. “Roxy, don’t be ridiculous.” Equius breathed a quiet sigh of relief. “You can’t give a robot a metal dick. That could kill somebody! It needs to be something softer, like silicone.” With that, any sense of relief once again vanished from the troll, and he found it very difficult to focus on calibrating the robot’s leg servomotors as his perspiration intensified.

Roxy rolled her eyes. “Jade, there is not a safer material in the world to stick in your junk than stainless steel. Trust me, I know.”

“Look, I’m not denying that,” the long-haired girl relented, “but how hard can you go with it? At a certain speed, you’re gonna punch a hole in somebody.”

“Well, that’s up to personal taste I guess,” Roxy said with a shrug, then turned to Equius. “What about you, ponyboy? How do you like it, hard and fast or slow and firm?”

Equius was physically incapable of responding. He was paralyzed in place, his face flushed a furiously dark blue and his entire body dripping with sweat. Roxy waited a bit longer for a response before speaking again. “Um, Equius?”

Jade peered at the troll a bit closer, waving a hand in front of his face and not seeing a reaction. “Equius, are you okay? Your face is _really_  blue. And, um, sweaty.”

At that, Roxy quickly got up out of her chair. “Okay, excess moisture and sensitive electronics _definitely_  don’t mix,” she said, walking up behind him. “Come on, let’s take a break and towel off.” She hooked her hands under his armpits, attempting to lift him up, and Equius reluctantly complied, rising to his feet. As he did, Jade took a passing glance at his pants, and she yelped.

“Oh! Equius… So _that’s_  what it is…”

A prominent lump protruded from the fabric of Equius’ shorts, and he made a choking noise as he felt the weight of Jade’s gaze upon it. Roxy could see what her human friend was staring at, and she smirked, snaking an arm around Equius’ waist to grab his package, making him yelp. “Ohhh, it looks like _someone’s_  mind started wandering…”

He bit his lip. “No… I’m not…”

“Take your pants off,” Jade commanded him.

“I–”

“Do it!”

Equius quickly complied, unbuttoning his shorts and letting them drop to the floor along with his underwear. As they fell, his indigo bone bulge sprang forth, twelve inches long and fully erect. Jade looked at it wide-eyed, and Roxy chuckled, wrapping her hand around his shaft and slowly stroking it, making him grunt.

The long-haired girl took a step toward him, still staring at his bulge. “Wow, you’re so big…” She dropped to her knees, her mouth right in front of his cock. She sniffed at it, letting out a pleased hum, then gave the tip a tentative lick.

Equius gasped. “Jade, wait…” Before he could say more, Jade took him into her mouth, making him moan as she bobbed her head up and down on his dripping member. “Oh god…” As she continued, Roxy took her hand off of Equius’ cock and moved up, slipping her fingers under the hem of his shirt. She did the same with her other hand, then pulled the article up, and Equius lifted his arms to let her take it off completely. She flung it to the side, leaving Equius completely naked except for his knee-high socks, and he shuddered as Jade continued pleasuring him orally, Roxy rubbing her hands over his sweat-slick chest.

“You really want this, don’t you?” Roxy muttered into his ear.

He hesitated for a moment. “Y-yes… but…”

Roxy raised an eyebrow. “But what?”

“Well… when you asked how I like it, I thought…”

The blonde chuckled. “Oh, I see. So you wanted _this_.” She pushed her hips forward, and Equius gasped as something long and hard pressed between his bare cheeks through Roxy’s skirt.

“Oh, you have… I mean, yes, but…”

“Hey Jade!” The dark-haired girl pulled off of Equius’ bulge, looking up at Roxy expectantly. “Equius wants to do this the _other_  way.”

Jade smiled excitedly. “Oh, that’s great!” she replied, then began to unbutton her pants.

Roxy muttered in Equius’ ear, “Hands and knees.” He swiftly obeyed, dropping to his knees, then following forwards with his hands on the floor. As he dropped, he immediately felt Jade’s dick rubbing against his face, twelve inches of hard brown flesh smearing precum on his cheek.

“You know what to do,” Jade said, looking down at him. “But no teeth!” He knew perfectly well, and he opened his mouth, making sure to keep his sharp fangs tucked behind his lips as he took Jade’s cock into his mouth. He could taste his own sweat as Jade slipped easily into him, and she moaned as the troll carefully bobbed his head on the first few inches of her length. “Oh, that’s good,” she hummed, placing her hands on Equius’ head as he continued.

Behind him, Roxy pulled up her skirt, bringing her own penis out and letting it flop against Equius’ bare ass. “Hey Jade, do we have any lubricant that isn’t WD-40?”

Jade bit her lip. “Oh, I don’t know…” She glanced around the immediate vicinity, seeing a first aid kit within reach, then slid it over and flipped the lid open. “Oh, here we go!” Reaching in, she pulled out a large rectangular tub. “Petroleum jelly! Not the best, but…”

“It’s fine. Not like I’m using a condom.” Roxy held her hands open, and Jade tossed the tub of jelly to her. After catching it, she leaned down, placing her free hand on Equius’ shoulder as she murmured into his ear. “Oh, and Equius, in case you’re wondering… I like it slow and firm.” She pressed the tip of her cock against his asshole, and Equius moaned around Jade’s shaft as she continued to gently thrust into his mouth.

Roxy popped the lid off the container and took a big scoop of petroleum jelly in two fingers, bringing it towards her dick, then stopping. “No double dipping,” she reminded herself, flicking the dollop of jelly into the crack of Equius’ ass and scooping out another helping. She slathered the oily substance over her member, stroking it until it was nice and evenly coated, then moved her hand to Equius. The troll shuddered as she lubed him up, first spreading a bit of the jelly between his cheeks, then dipping the rest of it into his anus, gently spreading her fingers as she thrust in and out of his waste chute. “Damn, you’re a tightass,” she said as she continued her preparations. “I guess I’ll just have to loosen you up.”

With that, she pulled her fingers out, wrapping them around her cock and leveling the tip against Equius’ pucker. She pushed forward gently, applying more and more pressure, until she finally entered, Equius groaning loudly as the first two inches of Roxy’s shaft slipped into his asshole. The blonde hummed appreciatevly at how tight he was, and she began to buck into him, grunting as she slowly pushed deeper into his colon. Spurred on by her actions, Jade wrapped her hands around Equius’ horns, then began thrusting into him deeper, making the blueblood gag as she forced six inches of her cock down his unwitting throat.

“You’re so good at this, Equius,” Jade assured him, gently wringing her hands around his horns as she pushed in and out of his throat. “You’re so obedient…”

Roxy grinned, groping at Equius’ muscular buttocks as she thrust deeper into his ass. “Yeah, you’d make a good pet. Or maybe a mount.” She lifted a hand and slapped his ass with a resounding smack, and he grunted loudly at the sting of it, feeling his bulge twitch beneath him as it leaked blue precum onto the floor.

“Oh, by the way, Equius…” The blueblood looked up at the long-haired girl as she continued plumbing his throat. Jade looked down at him, smiling sweetly as she made eye contact. “I like it hard and fast.” With that, she tightly grasped his horns, and then suddenly pushed her hips forward, driving her dick into his throat faster and deeper than before, and Equius choked and sputtered loudly as he attempted to get used to the new pace.

“Good lord, Jade, you’re gonna kill him,” Roxy said disapprovingly. Despite her objections, she was enjoying the display, and she began to move subtly faster as well.

Jade rolled her eyes. “Oh, he’ll be fine! He can breathe through his mouth.” Indeed, Equius was furiously inhaling and exhaling as Jade continued to fuck his face, and the island girl moaned in arousal at the lovely sounds he was making. In short time, she’d managed to fit the entirety of her cock down Equius’ throat, and she hummed in pleasure as her hips slapped against his face. The troll’s grunts had grown quieter as he’d grown accustomed to her girth, moaning even as she fiercely slammed his throat. Roxy was almost fully inside of him as well, and he could feel the tip of her cock gently stimulating his gene bladder, making his bulge throb painfully and his nook leak with indigo fluids as she steadily fucked his ass.

“Almost there, Equius,” Jade said breathlessly, her thrusts becoming erratic as she approached her limit. She panted with each buck of her hips, until finally she came, howling as her cock throbbed inside of Equius, emptying a massive payload of semen down his throat. She pulled out as her orgasm continued, first coating his throat with cum, then filling his cheeks with sticky fluid, and finally spattering his face with a thick coating of white. As his mouth filled with her salty material, Equius came as well, his swollen blue bulge throbbing as he shot one streak after another of thick indigo material onto the floor, and a rush of runny liquid flowing out of his nook. Roxy continued to prod the blueblood’s gene bladder with her dick now fully inside of his waste chute, milking his orgasm with each thrust. Equius swallowed the thick, sticky cum filling his mouth, then gasped for breath, shuddering as fluid continued to dribble out of his member, pooling beneath him.

Roxy sighed. “You guys are so fast.” She increased the pace of her thrusts, her balls slapping against Equius’ ass as she pounded him faster, making the blueblood groan as more genetic material leaked out of his bulge. She was close, and she leaned down over Equius as she slammed into his colon faster and faster. “Almost there,” she whispered into his ear, bucking wildly against him. “Almost… _mmmmm_!” Roxy finally reached her climax, and Equius gasped as she came inside of him, emptying her semen directly into his gene bladder. He grunted painfully, each burst of semen against his prostate making his own cock fire another spurt of genetic material onto the floor. Finally, her orgasm died down, and Roxy pulled out of Equius with a loud “schlorp,” leaving his asshole gaping open slightly as she withdrew, a fine string of cum still connecting from his ass to the tip of her dick.

Equius panted for breath. Shaking on his hands and knees, he reached up and pulled his sunglasses off, thankful they were there to shield his eyes from Jade’s discharge. He did his best to wipe the rest of her semen off his face, and he flicked it onto the floor, drawing a frown from Jade.

“Well… that was something, wasn’t it?” Roxy said, pushing up a bit from Equius, her shaft resting between his cheeks.

“Something _awesome_ ,” Jade answered, holding her member in her hand, spent, but still mostly hard.

The troll continued to breathe heavily before he answered. “Yes… I suppose so.”

Roxy giggled. “I guess you don’t need a sexbot after all. You’ve got us!”

That drew a grin from Jade. “Yeah! We can fuck you better than a robot every could anyway!”

“It’s… not a sexbot…” Equius insisted as he slowly rose to his knees. “It’s a training robot. For wrestling.”

“Psh,” Jade replied, waving her hand dismissively. “You don’t need a robot to train you in wrestling. We can do that too!”

Equius looked at her quizzically. “Seriously?”

“Sure! I bet you I can pin you right now!” She rubbed her hands together maniacally. “And if I win, I get to fuck you in the butt next!”

“Wait, I’m not–”

“ _Now_!” The dark-haired girl quickly tackled Equius, catching him completely off guard, and he let out a confused cry as they tumbled to the floor. Jade took advantage of his confusion, effortlessly pinning him to the floor on his stomach. “Ha! I win!”

Roxy shrugged. “Well, rules are rules. Spin him around here.” Equius gasped as Jade pulled him up by the stomach, shifting him around so he was facing Roxy on all fours. The blonde smiled as she crawled closer to him, the tip of her cock still slick with semen and petroleum jelly prodding against his lips. “And since you’re here… suck it.”

Equius was hesistant, but he obeyed, wrapping his lips around her shaft and pushed her into his mouth. He winced at the odd taste of what could only be his own waste chute, but his bulge was rock hard beneath him, and he moaned quietly as Roxy gently bucked into his throat. Meanwhile, Jade pressed her saliva-coated cock against his well-lubed anus, and he quivered as she slammed into his colon at a rate far faster than Roxy had. He wondered if a sexbot might not be preferable to this, if only because it was more controllable, but his concerns were soon washed away in a flood of blue and white.

**Author's Note:**

> For a prompt fill on my blog. Check out http://alcumia.tumblr.com if you'd like to see more like this.


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